My online context

Everything that I do online has to be understood in the context of the constant harassment (trolling) that I now get on an almost daily basis. 

If you find that I am more hostile or that I cut you off pretty quickly or that I say up front that I don't want to debate... please try to understand.

There is not a week that goes by that I don't get several nasty comments and emails. Right now, it is about 1 or 2 every couple of days. On very bad days, I could get up to 10 comments.

People calling me a cunt, telling me to go kill myself, speculating on the very most private details of my life- how much I eat (some troll amount like 7000 calories). My personal hygiene or its imagined lack. How soon I'm going to die.

They love picturing me dead or mutilated.

People who stalk my Twitter timeline even though they've been blocked for months. People who tweet nastiness at me for hours on end.

A photo with such a level of gore that I am flinching now even thinking about it.

The more attention my writing gets, the worse the harassment gets.

This is NOTHING compared with what other fat activists are going through. Nothing.

And I barely ever talk about it, because it upsets the people that love me to hear that someone told me to kill myself. Again. 

I want more people to read my work. I think fat activism is extremely important. But the people who write about it?  It COSTS us to do this.