One of the ways in which the dudebro part of the internet (the *cough* manosphere **cough, choke, splutter, die of laughter** ) likes to attack fat activists is by complaining that fat women never date fat men.

This is, of course, in between loud shrieking complaints about how gross and awful fat women are. Because nothing the manosphere does makes any sense.

Can someone please come collect this pail of slime? If you've lost a bag full of whining and rape apology, I know where you left it. Someone come haul this garbage to the dump.

But since I keep getting the 'question' of why I am not dating a fat man whine-shouted at me online, I will answer it.

I never dated a fat guy, because the fat guys I liked never wanted to date me.

That's it, dudes. I had a thing at different times for different cute, chubbly dudes, but they didn't want to date me.

There is no conspiracy.

Now, if you'll allow me to speculate a bit, I do think there is a reason why a lot of straight fat women end up with thinner male partners. I have a theory.

My theory is that fat men get shit from other men. They get shit in ways that are meant to bring their masculinity into question. That being fat somehow makes them less of a man.

(Please note-- I am not agreeing with or endorsing this. Just speculating on my observations.)

That for straight men, especially the younger ones, being able to have the trophy 'hot' girlfriend is a marker of masculinity. That having a fat woman as a partner also brings masculinity into question among other men. And that some fat men may not be willing or able to stand up to the further questioning of their status as Men that dating a fat woman would bring.

Patriarchy ruins everything again.

What do you think? I welcome a discussion in the comments, especially from fat men.